Things I was Supposed to Read Today
1. A manual on how to perform self-castration. It apparently has many benefits (such as preventing male-pattern baldness.) It also requires cutting your balls off though.
2. An article on perforated condoms. "Doesn't ruin the whole point?" you may ask. Yes, yes it does. But it is consistent with Catholic teachings on the Theology of the Body. So there's that.
3. An passionate 3,000 word endorsement of John McCain from the Senate Democratic Majority Leader of Rhode Island.
Things I Actually Read Today
1. A Wikipedia page about War Machine, Iron Man's occasional sidekick.
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